Tag Archives: transitions

Woo Hoo! Back To School! (Part 2)

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Part 1 of my back-to-school blog covered basics of ensuring a smooth transition for you and your child(ren) as a new school year begins. This post focuses on the back-to-school “jitters” and those children who truly get anxious.

Not only do students encounter beginning-of-school jitters, but teachers and school staff also feel the emotions of a new year, a new beginning.  I worked in schools for 30 years and can safely affirm that I rarely had a good night’s sleep the night before school started.  It’s a natural phenomenon to get excited, scared, eager, or overwhelmed at the start of something new. Although some accept change with ease and slip into new experiences with little fanfare, others just – well – worry, stress, and get anxious.

The following tips (extrapolated from NASP “Back to School Transitions: Tips for Parents”) are to help those of you with children who are beginning school soon and tend to get anxious.

  • The first few days may be rough; try not to overreact. Particularly the younger student may suffer separation anxiety after a summer with parents and loose schedules. School personnel are trained to deal with children who may have a hard time adjusting.  Best advice:  Drop off your child without lingering, say “I love you and will be back at the end of the day,” then leave.
  • Talk to your child and let them know that you care. Model optimism and confidence and reinforce your belief in their ability to cope. Tell them that it’s o.k. to be nervous about starting something new, but he/she will be fine once they become more familiar with their new surroundings. Best advice:  Send positive, short notes in their lunch box or backpack and listen to any concerns when they arrive home. Reinforce positives as they discuss their school day.
  • Try to remain calm and positive about any bad experiences from the previous year. Those who had a difficult school year may have more anxiety about their return to school. Children who were teased or bullied, those encountering academic problems or any other difficulties may be reluctant to start another year with a positive attitude. Best advice: Talk to school personnel before school begins about this and then reassure your child that this is a new year and a fresh start. Reinforce that you will be working with the school to ensure a smooth school year and prevention of further issues.
  • Give your child strategies to cope if they are feeling anxious. Be open with the school and keep open communication with your child’s teachers. Encourage your child to tell you or the teacher if problems continue.  Best advice: Maintain open communication with your child and your child’s teacher.
  • Try to allow your child to meet with other students and school friends before the first day to ease your child into the new academic year. Best advice: Encourage your older child to contact friends, or if your child is younger, call the parents yourself to schedule play dates.
  • Plan to volunteer in your child’s classroom periodically throughout the year. This reinforces to your child that you are interested in their learning and that school and family are communicating. Additionally, you are building relationships with teachers, classmates, and other school personnel, as well as learning about classroom routines and atmosphere. Best advice: Even if you can’t regularly volunteer, periodic parent help is often welcomed and only benefits your child.

If your child’s anxiety becomes problematic, extreme in nature, or lasts for an extended period, make an appointment to speak with the teacher or school psychologist. More in-school support may be indicated or other resources in the school or community may be suggested. Remember: most children are very resilient and with support, encouragement, and communication will be able to have a successful school year.

Leave me a comment if you liked this entry.  I’d love to hear from you!  Any suggestions for future entries?  Let me know.

Woo Hoo! Back to School! (Part 1)

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It’s August already and it’s time to think—Back to School. With most schools across the country starting their school year before Labor Day, now is a great time to begin preparations.

Of course, each developmental/grade level may bring different challenges or expectations.  But there are a few general guidelines for ALL children that I’ve highlighted below:

  • Schedule all doctor and dental visits before the start of the school year.  Be sure to mention to your child’s doctor any concerns about their emotional or psychological development.  Your physician is able to determine the difference between age-appropriate issues or those that require further assessment.  Be prepared before school begins to notify school staff of any problems so they may be addressed early in the school year, if possible.
  • Start re-setting routines, such as mealtimes and bedtimes.  In the week or two before school starts, begin to talk to your child about the need for routines.  If you discontinued certain routines for summer, such as reading with your child before bed, then reestablish this. Stress the importance of a good breakfast, and start this every morning, as well.
  • Turn off the TV.  Emphasize quiet activities in the morning, such as games, reading, or coloring rather than turning on the TV. This will help your child ease into the school year. Try to maintain this throughout the school year; watching too much TV can be distracting before school.
  • Get rid of the TV in your child’s bedroom!  While I am on the topic of TV, I want to emphasize there is NO reason to have a TV in your child’s bedroom.  It has the potential to keep your child awake until late hours. Also, it’s impossible to monitor your child’s viewing. Even if you believe they will listen to you, they might turn it on before school (see above), and TV’s are not babysitters. Make TV viewing a family activity, or set guidelines for a certain amount of TV viewing during the school week.
  • Make copies of important school documents.  Keep a folder(s) handy of important documents, such as health and emergency information. Health records are often acceptable for over a year and can be used for other activities, such as extracurriculars, sports teams, or clubs.  Also keep important school records in a folder, including reports from teachers, report cards, special commendations, etc.
  • Homework areas.  Children should have a designated homework space in their house.  Older children should be allowed to complete homework or study in their rooms or other quiet areas of the home.  Younger children should be in an area of the house where they can be monitored by an adult, such as the kitchen, dining area, or family room.
  • Designate an area of the house for backpacks.  All children should be responsible for emptying backpacks every day and placing important notices and notes in a designated area for parents to read/sign/return. The backpack should be put in that specific area at night and repacked so as to be ready for a quick departure in the morning.
  • If your child is going to a new school.  Visit the new school with your child, once or several times depending on the age of the child. Designate meeting zones for after school pickups, visit the teacher, locate the classroom, etc. to ease anxiety.  Always call ahead to make sure the specific school personnel will be available for introductions.
  • Mark important dates.  As soon as you receive the school year calendar (and all schools distribute these), mark your calendar for important events, such as conferences, back to school night, concerts, etc. This is especially important if you have children in different schools and will also aid in arranging for babysitters when needed for those who must stay home.
  • Clothes.  Buy early and check your school to see if they require uniforms of a specific color or style. Schools often have rules about length of skirts or shorts, bare midriffs, halter-tops, flip-flops, tee shirts with inappropriate messages, etc. Specific guidelines will be available at the school; avoid conflict with your child by reading the guidelines before school starts.

My next blog entry will deal with the first week of school, and how to cope with the anxious child (and parents) as the new school year begins.

*These tips were extrapolated from NASP “Back to School Transitions:  Tips for Parents” at www.nasponline.org