Tag Archives: positive reinforcement

Woo Hoo! Back To School! (Part 2)

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Part 1 of my back-to-school blog covered basics of ensuring a smooth transition for you and your child(ren) as a new school year begins. This post focuses on the back-to-school “jitters” and those children who truly get anxious.

Not only do students encounter beginning-of-school jitters, but teachers and school staff also feel the emotions of a new year, a new beginning.  I worked in schools for 30 years and can safely affirm that I rarely had a good night’s sleep the night before school started.  It’s a natural phenomenon to get excited, scared, eager, or overwhelmed at the start of something new. Although some accept change with ease and slip into new experiences with little fanfare, others just – well – worry, stress, and get anxious.

The following tips (extrapolated from NASP “Back to School Transitions: Tips for Parents”) are to help those of you with children who are beginning school soon and tend to get anxious.

  • The first few days may be rough; try not to overreact. Particularly the younger student may suffer separation anxiety after a summer with parents and loose schedules. School personnel are trained to deal with children who may have a hard time adjusting.  Best advice:  Drop off your child without lingering, say “I love you and will be back at the end of the day,” then leave.
  • Talk to your child and let them know that you care. Model optimism and confidence and reinforce your belief in their ability to cope. Tell them that it’s o.k. to be nervous about starting something new, but he/she will be fine once they become more familiar with their new surroundings. Best advice:  Send positive, short notes in their lunch box or backpack and listen to any concerns when they arrive home. Reinforce positives as they discuss their school day.
  • Try to remain calm and positive about any bad experiences from the previous year. Those who had a difficult school year may have more anxiety about their return to school. Children who were teased or bullied, those encountering academic problems or any other difficulties may be reluctant to start another year with a positive attitude. Best advice: Talk to school personnel before school begins about this and then reassure your child that this is a new year and a fresh start. Reinforce that you will be working with the school to ensure a smooth school year and prevention of further issues.
  • Give your child strategies to cope if they are feeling anxious. Be open with the school and keep open communication with your child’s teachers. Encourage your child to tell you or the teacher if problems continue.  Best advice: Maintain open communication with your child and your child’s teacher.
  • Try to allow your child to meet with other students and school friends before the first day to ease your child into the new academic year. Best advice: Encourage your older child to contact friends, or if your child is younger, call the parents yourself to schedule play dates.
  • Plan to volunteer in your child’s classroom periodically throughout the year. This reinforces to your child that you are interested in their learning and that school and family are communicating. Additionally, you are building relationships with teachers, classmates, and other school personnel, as well as learning about classroom routines and atmosphere. Best advice: Even if you can’t regularly volunteer, periodic parent help is often welcomed and only benefits your child.

If your child’s anxiety becomes problematic, extreme in nature, or lasts for an extended period, make an appointment to speak with the teacher or school psychologist. More in-school support may be indicated or other resources in the school or community may be suggested. Remember: most children are very resilient and with support, encouragement, and communication will be able to have a successful school year.

Leave me a comment if you liked this entry.  I’d love to hear from you!  Any suggestions for future entries?  Let me know.

Time-Out! Make the Most of this Behavior Change Strategy-Part 2

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Last week’s post focused on an introduction to the use of time-out. I emphasized the fact that your child must have the skill set to meet adult expectations before you consider using time-out. I also discussed defining appropriate behaviors for time-out, assigning time out areas (location) at home and at school, and preparing for the use of time-out at home. This week I will focus on the actual steps of implementing an effective time-out procedure.

When you are ready to implement a time-out, your child should be told quickly what behavior earned the time-out and what behaviors are required to end the time-out. Remember these important points: it is recommended that you NOT engage your child in a long dissertation about his/her behavior, and there should be NO negotiating, begging, or arguing, as that will only reinforce the inappropriate behaviors.

After you’ve identified the behavior and calmly stated why he/she is going to time-out, remove your child to your specific time-out area for brief and pre-determined periods of time.  A time-out should last no longer than 1 to 2 minutes for each year of the child’s age. For example, an 8-year-old will be in time-out for 8 minutes, a 2-year-old, 2 minutes, etc.  A child in time-out should be supervised for the entire period, with attention focused away from the child. Do not converse, engage, or play with your child.

When time-out is over, I like to use an audible signal to indicate that the child may come out of time-out. A kitchen timer, oven timer, microwave timer, or audible wristwatch may be used to signal that time-out has ended. In this way, the child learns to NOT leave time out until he hears the signal. (On many occasions, it will remind the adult, as well!).

The child may come out of time-out ONLY if their behavior is appropriate, i.e. sitting quietly for the final 30 seconds to 1 minute of the time-out. If you release your child from time-out during a tantrum, while screaming, or being disruptive, your child learns to express these behaviors to end the time-out. If your child refuses to leave time-out, ignore him/her. Do not engage in arguments at this time as it can lead to noncompliance with the time-out process.

When your child leaves time-out, he/she must complete the task or request that occurred just prior to the targeted behaviors. Allowing a child to use time-out to avoid a task or situation is counterproductive. For example, your 10-year-old spilled a glass of juice on the floor, resulting in a tantrum and refusal to clean the spill upon your request. After the 10 minutes in time-out, he/she will be required to clean up the spillage – not you.

When time-out occurs in a school situation, it should be shared with all staff involved with the child. How long the time-out lasted, the child’s behavior while in time-out and the behavior directly preceding or leading to the time-out should be documented and posted in entry/exit of the time-out location for other staff members.

Written documentation can reveal important data about your child and his/her behavior and the effectiveness of the time-out. It is imperative if your child is in time-out in school that proper documentation is recorded for every occurrence. However, I personally do not believe that documentation at home is as important as at school UNLESS your child’s behavior has become so problematic that documenting it would help other caregivers. In all situations, if the behaviors do not decrease after two weeks, then reevaluate the procedure, with one important exception—If the behaviors are dangerous, it is recommended that you not wait two weeks before seeking the help of a professional.

Of course, time-out does have limitations to consider. When in time-out, the child is removed from positive learning and/or social situations. For children with limited social skills, this is particularly concerning. Some children LIKE being alone and time-out is too reinforcing for them. Time-out can also be reinforcing to adults as it removes the difficult child, which can entice the adult to use time-out too frequently, for longer periods of time than recommended, or for other than targeted behaviors. That is why keeping a written log and reviewing it daily or weekly can be so important. If the log indicates that the procedure is not working, then the program may be tweaked to make it more effective.

Time-out is a very effective procedure for behavior change if used properly, with good planning, documentation, and review. I would love to hear your experiences with time-out with your children or students.  Please leave me a reply with your comments, suggestions, or possible future topics.

Time-Out! Make the Most of this Behavior Change Strategy

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As a follow up to my last post on temper tantrums, I wanted to focus this week on one of my favorite behavior change strategies—time-out. Time-out is often used incorrectly, so I’d like to provide some practical and useful tips and advice on the proper use of time-out.

Time-out is actually shortened from the phrase time-out from positive reinforcement.  In other words, you are removing a child from the opportunity to earn reinforcement when a specified misbehavior occurs. This reinforcement may be a treat, a preferred task or activity, attention from parent or teacher, a TV show, etc.

To implement a time-out approach, you must first identify the behavior(s) that are appropriate for time-out. Also, the child must have the skills to be able to comply with your demands. For example, if you ask your two-year-old child to clean her room, she probably doesn’t have the skill set to complete such a task, it might not be safe for her to complete the task alone, and developmentally she probably isn’t ready for such a multistep, complicated process. However, if she’s able to pick up her three stuffed animals and place them in her toy chest, then she has mastered ONE component of cleaning her room. It is NOT appropriate to punish a child for noncompliance when she does not have the skills to comply with your demands.

What’s an appropriate time-out location? Appropriate time out areas should be clean, safe, boring and in view of an adult supervisor. The area should not be frightening, threatening, nor provide access to TV’s, video games, music, or other enjoyable tasks. Time-out will not be successful if the designated location is a better place than the environment the child was in.  In other words, it is important to provide the child’s home or classroom with a high rate of positive reinforcement when the child is engaged in appropriate behaviors. The time-out area should be inside the home such as in a designated chair, bottom of a staircase, or the bathroom.  In a classroom, time-out is in a designated chair or a seat in another classroom, but never in unsupervised areas or in an unsupervised hallway.

When implementing time-out at home, preparation is a must. Consider the following:

  • Define appropriate behaviors for time-out, those which are measurable, observable, clearly stated, and known to the child.
  • A simple, written plan describing the procedure for time-out should be available to all caregivers in the home (i.e., babysitters, day care, etc.) and followed by all by agreement.
  • Rules should be followed as related to the target behaviors. These rules should be stated positively, observable, have been pre-taught, reviewed and re-reviewed regularly. Consider posting basic rules, as well.
  • Make sure that the child’s tasks are within his/her skill level.
  • Time-out areas in the home should always be monitored by an adult, be nonreinforcing for the child, and be realistic and appropriate.
  • Pre-teach your child about your time-out procedures, like a role-play situation, and before the child misbehaves for the first time. Have your child practice time-out steps, be able to state the behaviors that will initiate a time-out, and understand the expectations surrounding time-out. If the child is well practiced, it will be easier to get to time-out when he/she really needs it!
  • Do not reteach time-out procedures or explain procedures during an actual time-out. If further teaching is required, provide more role-play situations in a calm period.

How do I implement effective time-out procedures in my home, or away from my home?  I will answer this question and provide more time-out information in next week’s post. Let me know what you think, or if you have any questions regarding time-out, please feel free to post them here and I will respond to your inquiries.